Switch It Up!

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Hello Beautiful Sexy People!

I’m switching it up!
I tried, I really did and some days I was even really good at it but most days I was just fooling myself and everyone around me. Working a 9-5 job in an office.

My constant pain and medication made it down right impossible for me to keep — well any job down really. The worst part was; me working my ass off– every damn time and it got me nowhere. It got me completely exhausted and frustrated and that made me into a little devil– the kind you don’t really want to be around but rather flick off your shoulder and step on– twice– just to make sure.

                  Look at me now– happy as a clam:)”

I’d just written a whole piece about me not being able to live up to other’s and my own expectations but as I read it back I felt like no one is going to want to read through all of this negativity and me just explaining how hard my life is.
I thought you know what, I’m just going to delete the whole thing and spin in into a positive direction.

I’d been looking for a suitable job for a few months now and then there came THE opportunity! And I switched of up! Leaving all assumptions of what a proper job should look like aside– and I became a fulltime (not in the literal sense of the word) Yoga teacher.
I had been teaching yoga for over 4 years now, after I got my ‘yoga teacher diploma’ in 2014, but it always came down to just a few hours of teaching here and there while working in an office. Don’t get me wrong I didn’t hate working in an office but it just didn’t work for me given the situation I’m in and the effort that had to go in to making it work made me very unhappy.
And look at me now– happy as a clam:)
Ok, my face is maybe not screaming happiness in this picture but in my defense the sun was in my eyes and sand was everywhere– everywhere. But nevertheless; very happy girl here↓

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This is me in Tenerife just before I started my new job in Holland.
I’d not been on a real summer holiday in –well over 5 years so you can imagine my excitement when I could finally sit my butt down on a beach an tan those buns!

And look at those happy faces! I’m blessed with this wonderful human being! He’s making dreams come through.

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Getting me into the right mindset is basically all I need to do to make this life with a chronic illness bearable. Actually getting into that right mindset is sometimes a lot harder than you think. We all have our obstacles and our brain telling us lies and weighing us down by  making up worst case scenarios and getting you stuck in this  negative ‘feedback loop from hell’ (Mark Manson, 2016).

The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A Fuck

When I was away on holiday I started to notice my attitude towards my pain was different. It felt more bearable, like I had accepted it into my life without letting it take over.

I was constantly telling myself not to let this moment be ruined by the pain. So I would just let go of the anger and disapointment and let myself have a good time. And sometimes in order for me to have a good time I would have to lie down on the bed in our hotel room to refuel my energy to be able to go to dinner. I had to tell myself; ‘just let it be wat it is, resisting is not a way to make it better so you might as well just give into it and relax’.

   “I will get so upset it will completely consume                            me to the point I get so angry and frustrated                that I start to punch walls and scream
                                    bloody murder.”

I’d read about this ‘feedback loop of hell’ in this fantastic book as shown down here↓ (The subtle art of not giving a fuck). And it really changed my outlook on life and how I handle and percieve things. this book is now my BIBLE and I strongly advise you to read it– preferably twice. It will help you with so many things in life and get you in that right mindset that will ultimately get you to become a better and happier person, I swear. It’s like a portable therapist; making you think and realize shit– a real reality check in the comfort of your own– well wherever you’re reading this magnificent book.
Anyway, back to the ‘feedback loop from hell’, to give my own little example; I would generally get quite upset whenever I would be about to go somewhere or do something fun and my pain would crash the party and alter my plans. Pretty understandable if you’re all excited about something and your body is just not cooperating.
The messed-up thing in this situation is I will get so upset it will completely consume me to the point I get so angry and frustrated that I start to punch walls and scream bloody murder (not every time– but you know– sometimes).
The mistake I’m making in this situation is not feeling bad about my plans getting altered by the effects of my illness, it’s me getting all worked up and angry about the fact that it’s making me all worked up and angry. I’m feeling bad about feeling bad. I’m getting sad about being sad. I think ‘why does it have to be this way’ and ‘why can’t I handle this in a more relaxed way’. I’m angry at myself for getting angry at something I can’t even control in the first place.

In the book it says;

“Or let’s say you have an anger problem. you get pissed off at the stupidest, most inane stuff, and you have no idea why. And the fact that you get pissed off so easily starts to piss you off even more. And then, in your petty rage, you realize that being angry all the time makes you a shallow and mean person, and you hate it so much that you get angry at yourself. Now look at you: you’re angry at yourself getting angry about being angry. fuck you, wall. Here have a fist.”
                                                                                                                             –Mark Manson.

I love his writing and his raw way of expression. It taught me so much, but it’s not like I’m forever cured of all life’s little terrors we ultimately attract upon ourselves.
I still catch myself red handed in the middle of the Feedback Loop from Hell, almost every day. But realizing it and acting on it from a different angle has given me so much.            Breaking up that “Loop” by telling yourself it’s ok to feel bad about a certain situation but just let it be that; a bad feeling, for just a short while, or however long it takes. But don’t get yourself all worked up about feeling bad or whatever feeling has come out of that situation. Don’t punish yourself for having an emotion but don’t dwell on it either, if that makes sense.
 

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Ok, enough book-talk. Look, we got a puppy!!! I (we) love him so much! He makes my life so much better and I can’t even imagine a life without this little buddy by my side, oh and hey! his name is Buddy;)

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Hope you enjoyed this little blogpost, little maybe not so little. But hey, if you liked it drop me a message an you must, I tell you, you MUST buy yourself this book from Mark Manson, it’s a life changer. You will thank me later.

Just klick on the link below to buy the book;) have fun!

buy here →The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A Fuck

Bye!

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Back To Square One.

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My god it has been for ever! And oh my has life been taking me from one end to another…

Let me start by apologizing for disappearing into thin air after my last post of me being absolutely chuffed about feeling lots and lots better and thoroughly believing I had been cured once and for all… you may already sense what’s coming…

The pain is back — in all its glory and almightiness… (I know it’s not a word, I think… god! relax).

     ‘Bit by bit the pain weaseled its
way back in to my daily routine until I caught it red handed taking over my life again; terrorizing my every move…’

You might’ve even seen some pictures of me looking like I was having the time of my life — I was, I really was enjoying a life with almost no pain and feeling the power of having control over my life again.

But then it all came back, bit by bit the pain weaseled its way back in to my daily routine until I caught it red handed taking over my life again; terrorizing my every move… and well, call me crazy, but after sharing with you my success of feeling so much better I just couldn’t find the words or courage to share with you this major disappointment. I just couldn’t. And a big part of me was obviously wishing it would just be temporarily and the ‘painfree’ times were just around the corner again. But after waiting and wishing for a long time I just have to admit to you and myself. The pain is back.

I have been taking my meds and been to all of my regular checkups at the hospital. In the meantime I’m trying to hold down a steady job which is very challenging considering the state I’m in most of the time. I’m trying to do all the right things to prevent the pain from getting worse and more powerful but it feels more like carrying water to the sea.. that might not even be a saying in the English language but I’m throwing it in here anyways.

I’ve been prescribed new drugs almost every month or so and every time I would cross my fingers hoping these new pills would give me my freedom back. But up until this day that hasn’t been the case. And although this sounds and ís rather depressing I must admit I could’ve taken it worse and my life isn’t all that bad… some moments it is, being in pain still feels like running a marathon, on one leg, every day. But I’ve met a wonderful person who wants to share his life with this curled up little bundle of pain called ‘me’. So even though I’m angry and unbelievably disappointed about being ill, I do enjoy life and whatever I (we) can make of it.

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I’m very thankful of this wonderful human being, standing beside me, being all tough and strong. He’s there when I’m feeling a bit better and we go paint the town red! But more importantly he’s there when I’m all down in the dumps because I’m in pain. Thank you for sticking by me even though you barely know me. (insert monkey face hiding behind its hands).

On a more chipper note; look I have a car! Still no drivers license though haha but we’re getting there!
But look how cute! I’m totally and utterly in love with it and can’t wait to be huffin and puffin around in this one. Fingers crossed it will not disintegrate on the motorway 😉

Thank you for checking in on me, feel free to leave a massage!

If it’s been a while since we spoke or saw each other please don’t hesitate and drop us a text or fb message and we’ll go for drinks! Maybe not for large pints of Guinness but catching up  over a hot cup of tea works just as well:) god when did I become so English…

Haha Ok. Doei!

PS. Mocht je je nou afvragen wat mijn ziekte beeld precies inhoud heb ik hier een mooie/deprimerende opsomming van symptomen. Dit doe ik natuurlijk niet om zielig te doen maar wel om awareness te brengen voor MCAS, en mocht je jouw klachten nou hierin herkennen neem contact op met je arts! Ook mij mag je alles vragen!

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Progress Bitches!

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Hi there!

It’s been a while, I know, my apologies.
But I can finely tell you that I’m doing better! Lots and lots better! you know the kind of better where you can drink a beer and not nearly die… Yay!

I told you guys about my new job as the new back-office at HQT, and I’m still loving every minute of it! My colleagues are the bomb and make everyday into a fun day at the office<3
Even outside of the office we have the bestest of times:)

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This is me and Maaike (my respected colleague and friend) and her little bundle of joy, chilling at Aqua Best.

It’s wonderful to be able to finely enjoy the finer things in life again, but it’s still a bit surreal, also because I can’t share this lovely time with RJ. It’s a good thing to be on your own again and dust yourself off and build a life with whatever you’re given, nobody said it was easy (insert Coldplay song here– sobs uncontrollably).

On another note! I’ve had a small procedure done at the hospital last Friday, they went inside of me to check if everything was OK with my bowels, eeehw Iris that’s gross! I know I’m sorry but it had to be done. As far as we know now I’m all good so I can continue to take my medicine and eat whatever the hell I want! Except for lactose:(

Anyways, my belly was not very happy with me because I had to take a lot of disgusting fluid before the procedure took place, here I will show you my belly in protest.. dear god I hate this.

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I can assure you that after the procedure my belly went back to it’s flat self, thank heavens!

Now I still feel a bit woozy, but I’m resting my skinny ass in bed and it’s back to work tomorrow so wish me luck!

Thank you so much for checking up on me, please leave a message when you have any questions or just want to say hi!

Lots of love from me<3

First day at the office

 

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I got meself a real job! you know, one where you have your owm desk and feel all grown up and stuff…  If only I acted like one;p

Ik heb een korte tijd bij BMW gewerkt maar zij zochten toch iemand die meteen 40 uur kon werken en aangezien ik nog in mijn opbouw fase zit en nog niet mijn volledige kracht terug heb, na lange tijd thuis gezeten te hebben, hadden ze iemand anders gevonden voor mijn functie.

Ik ben nu nog bezig met aansterken en leren omgaan met de pijn met een heel team om me heen voor 6 maanden lang 3 keer in de week 1,5 uur.

Nu ben ik onlangs aangenomen als Backoffice Medewerker bij HQT, een technisch detacheringsbedrijf, of te wel HR werkzaamheden verrichten bij een uitzend bureau die gespecialiseerd is in het plaatsen en zoeken van technisch opgeleiden mensen. interessant he! haha.

Vandaag mijn eerste dag gehad en ik ben super enthousiast over het team en the future! Hopelijk werkt mijn buik mooi mee en kan ik mijn leven weer een beetje oppakken. Ik moet soms nog even wennen als ik veel onder de mensen ben, ik heb stiekem toch vrij lang thuis gezeten met pijn en dat creëert op een gegeven moment wel een eigen wereldje, een klein, alleenig wereldje.

Ik ben heel erg benieuwd ‘what the futere holds for me’ en hopelijk komt mij nog veel positiviteit tegemoet:)

O.a.o.n. Ik heb super veel zin in Koningsdag, ik hoop jullie ook! Misschien zie ik sommige van jullie voorbij huppelen op het stadhuis plein, nu alleen nog hopen op lekker weer! come on April, give us some summer vibes!

Love and kisses!!

 

 

 

New Job

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Hi peeps!

This means a lot to me, being able to make my own money, maybe not a lot but you gotta (re)start somewhere!

I’ve recently started my new job  as the front desk secretary of BMW.

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I’m super existed and after my few days of training I can’t wait to make my first day on my own; answering calls, keeping up with all the paperwork, E-mails and making sure every client who walking through the door gets the Full BMW experience!

I feel like a human again and hopefully it’ll only get better from here on out! “From here on out”…? That sounds like bad English… idk haha correct me if I’m wrong;)

I’m still taking the usual medication and eating lot’s and whatever I want (hah!) and haven’t felt better in literally a year. I also restarted my Chiropractic treatments at another facility here in Eindhoven and it’s still helping a lot! I got into a little bit of a funk after I had to quite my treatments at Top Chiropractic and the pain slowly wiggled his way back in but I feel it’s much more under control now… could be different in an hour but right now it feels like we’re on the right track.

I’m not saying the pain is completely gone or less intense, but the periods of time where I have less or no pain gets longer and longer so whenever I do have pain (on several occasions during the day) I’ve build up the physical energy and mental strength to take the hit. It still puts me down sometimes or makes me feel powerless but I’m taking it day by day.

This was my little update, hope you’ve enjoyed it or found it useful in any way. I’m still open for questions and love to hear about your experience with anything you’d like to share. Misery likes company;).

Please share happy things too!

For anyone who’s wondering the new BGB Beauty bags are in the development stage and you can probably tell by the picture but the majority of you have chosen the Marble print!!!1488639138508

(This is a sample not the actual bag)

Love,  Iris♡

Ignoring The Pain

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What to do what to do… niks leek te helpen. Van dieet naar dieet en genoeg pillen voor een heel leven! Nothing did the trick or at least not enough.  The chiropractic gave me a little nudge in the right direction but I ran out of money to continue my treatment (for now).

My Mum eventually got me to try some weed oil (CBD oil– it’s without the fun stuff;). I was magorly sceptical but ‘hey’ what did I have to lose? That’s right; absolutely nothing.

I stopped eating ridiculously healthy and stopped caring about giving my body the best of the best, nothing seemed to work anyways. I had put in so much time, money and stress into giving my body what it needed and all it ever did was reject everything.

I basically let go of everything I ever learned about healthy eating and foods you should and shouldn’t eat with irritable bowels and so on. I just started eating what I wanted whenever I wanted it. I’m not saying it’s a very smart decision or it’s doing any good for my belly, I’m basically giving up and trying to ignore the pain and pick up my life what’s left of it and moving on.

With the CBD oil and caring less about what I eat the pain has reduced to — manageable. I do however still take some of my medication; hopefully it does something good, you never know with my belly.

So for those who are interested; I’m currently still taking both anti histamines and the enzymes in combination with the pills that add more stomach acid to digest your food better. In my previous blog post you can find the exact names and website where you can find these supplements.

Find out next week about my new Job!

Hopefully you’ve enjoyed reading this little update and if you want to know more about me or about my journey in finding the solution to my tummy issues go ahead and have a look at my previous blog posts!

Thank you so much for visiting BellyGirlBlog♡

–Iris

Go down below to visit my other social media. ⬇

New Limited Edition BGB beauty bags!

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Hi gorgeous people, enjoying a nice Sunday evening?

I’ve been working on these new festive BGB beauty bags, just in time for Christmas!

Go have a look on my Hand Made page and maybe you’ll find just the last Christmas gift you needed for this year♡

Nu bij je thuis voor maar 9 euro!!! Geen verzendkosten! Wat een feest:)

Hope you have a wonderful Christmas and a happy new year!!!☆°•○☆img_20161218_210518

A Little BellyGirlBlog Update

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Hi Lovely People!

It’s been a while, and unfortunately that’s not a good thing, it means there is too little improvement to write about:(. I still wanted to give you a little update on how I’m doing and my new medication; you never know it might help you or someone you know with any similar problems.

Yes you could go to a doctor and tell them your story and ask them for help. They will start by going down a checklist to exclude any severe illnesses and when blood tests show nothing they will send you home with a poor excuse called IBS (irritable bowel syndrome). You might just have just that, but when nothing helps and no diet makes any difference… doctors will send you from place to place but won’t actually know what the hell to do with you.

When you’ve tried it all and normal protocol tests won’t show any abnormalities, you’ve come to the right place my friend… well, I don’t have THE answer (yet) but I have already tried so many “non protocol treatments” (this is probably very bad English), one of them might just be THE ONE for you! (if this is your first visit on this blog; have a look at my other ‘belly issue’ related posts to see if it might inspire you to try new treatments or diets.

This blog post I will talk a little about my two new sorts of medication and supplements I take every day and have made a significant difference even though the bad days still win it from the good ones. I will list it all down below and elaborate underneath in NL and EN.

1. Nalcrom 200 mg (natriumcromoglicaat). Antihistaminicum
2. Zaditen 1 mg (ketotifeni fumaras). Antihistaminicum direct.
3. Enzymen Complex (merknaam: NOW). Enzymen voor vertering/for digestion.
4. 1130 Betaine & Pepsine. voor extra maagzuur voor betere vertering/for extra gastric acid.

(NL)
Nummer 1 en 2 zijn antihistaminicum en helpen mij bij elke maaltijd zodat ik een verminderde reactie krijg op eten, jup welleenswaar elk soort eten. Nalcrom heb ik in de vorm van een zakje poeder en los ik op in 200 ml water en neem ik in 15-20 minuten voor elke maaltijd en voor het slapen. De Zaditen heb ik in tablet vorm en neem ik elke ochtend voor het ontbijt in en elke avond voor het avond eten.
Nummer 3 en 4 zijn voor mij van belang voor een goede vertering en opnamen van voedingsstoffen, deze neem ik in met water TIJDENS de maaltijd.
Ik ben geen dokter dus ik ga niet te veel lullen over wat het allemaal precies inhoud en wanneer je dit nodig hebt. Heb je het idee dat deze middelen het proberen waard zijn, vraag het na aan je dokter en Google er eerst eens op los en kijk ook naar ervaringen van andere mensen mbt het desbetreffende middel. Nummer 3 en 4 kun je in Nederland kopen bij www.derooderoos.nl en heb je geen doktersrecept voor nodig.

Mijn ervaring.
De eerste dag dat ik de twee antihistaminicum nam voelde ik al meteen verschil. Ik had minder last van krampen boven in mijn buik en de pijn kwam pas veel later en de heftige (aanval) pijn nam ook af. Ik heb nu helaas een hele wisselende reactie op eten en weet niet wanneer het goed gaat en wanneer fout. Toch heb ik het idee dat de Nalcrom en Zaditen wel helpen en de klachten over het algemeen, en dus globaal gezien, minder worden. Het is dus geen aanhoudende stijgende lijn maar meer een stijgende op en af lijn… wauw iris wat mooi beschreven… maar je snapt ‘m.
De Betaine&pepsine en Enzymen hebben totaal geen effect op de pijn en doen voor mijn gevoel weinig, maar zorgen ondertussen wel voor een betere opnamen van voedingsstoffen en een betere vertering. Dit resulteert in een iets hoger energie level en verbeterde bloeduitslagen. Al deze 4 middelen kunnen absoluut geen kwaad als je het bijvoorbeeld niet per se nodig hebt, dus proberen kan altijd! Nummer 1 en 2 worden door je verzekering vergoed en nummer 3 en 4 niet.

(EN)
Number 1 and 2 are antihistamines and prevent some of the severe reactions I have on food, any kind of food. I take the Nalcrom in the form of powder and dissolve it in 200 ml of water about 15-20 minutes before every meal and before going to bed. The Zaditen I have in the form of tablets and I take them before breakfast and dinner.
Number 3 and 4 are supplements and help me digest my food better and make sure I absorb more nutrients.
All four of these will not do you any harm when taking them if not completely necessary. Google them and search for peoples’ experiences with the products when you’re not completely sure, also discuss it with your doctor or nutrition. Number 1 and 2 you need a doctors’ prescription for and will most likely be covered by your insurance. Number 3 and 4 are available for purchase here in Holland on this website: www.derooderoos.nl
If you don’t live in Holland just Google it and you will most likely find a website that will have these supplements.
I’ve had a very positive experience with the antihistamines and could feel the difference in matter of hours. The pain now is fluctuating really badly and even though I sometimes don’t benefit from my medicine it has kept me from taking painkillers for over a month. Tiny little victory for ya there;). Number 3 and 4 don’t really do much pain-wise but they help me digest my food better which is also very important.

I’m still going to my chiropractor three times a week and these 5 minute visits can be quite invasive, sometimes it reliefs me from pain sometimes it causes a very severe reaction, DON’T WORRY, it’s all part of the process!

I hope you liked my little update that grew into a rather lengthily one haha. If you have any questions or suggestions leave me a message on here or Facebook or email me on irisgerits@gmail.com.

 

I’m also currently making some new beauty bags! They will be online and available for purchase this Sunday. All the BGB bags will be on sale for Christmas!

I send you lots of love and Christmas joy!!

X Iris.